Recently in Humor Category

I hope everyone is staying cool with the recent burst of hot weather. But imagine my surprise when this weather forecast came up for Richmond.

OK, so it’s not exactly real. Here’s the backstory on the weatherman who did this. (It never actually aired — it was his final forecast intended for those at the station.) The kids love it, once they understand it’s actually not real. (Will likes the volcano, while the twins like Godzilla.) But the recent storms and temperatures make me wonder if this is what’s coming next?

Boy, Will is really starting to show some skill in the artwork department. And those who know me would understand that he certainly didn’t get that gene from me.

The big thing is Will actually had a piece of art from first grade on display at a local bank. The display ended last weekend, but right there in the entrance to the branch was Will’s art work. It was in the style of Eric Carle, and I must say that he did a great job with it. (If the name doesn’t ring a bell, perhaps you recall reading Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? or The Very Hungry Caterpillar.) I can see why it was chosen.

So he’s got one up on his Mom and Dad in this respect — we didn’t do anything public display-worthy.

Then there is this recent project at school, where he made a topographic map of the United States, using salt dough. Being the expert at maps that he is, he actually did a good job with getting the mountain ranges in, with different heights, and even 3 rivers (Rio Grande, Mississippi, and James). He even painted Canada and Mexico in different colors.

Which brings me to an interesting exchange from the recent camping trip (pictures still pending) with Will. He was impressing the kids and adults with his geography knowledge around a campfire, when he had this conversation with one of the adults:

Will: Canada is on top of the United States.
Adult (making a joke): So, if Canada is on top of the United States, what does that it make it?
Will: What?
Adult: The hat.
Will (without missing a beat): So, what does that make Mexico? The pants?

If you didn’t realize how much of a geography wiz Will is, take a look at this map of the United States — that he drew from memory. Proportions may not be quite there yet, but the detail is stunning.

As I said, he’s got an interesting set of artistic skills.

Kellie and I did see Star Trek (the movie) a week ago, as I had previously mentioned. It turns out that their first choices for the roles of Kirk and Spock — well, they weren’t quite old enough yet. See what they would have looked like if they had gone with their first choices.

OK, maybe not. Kellie was playing around on the Star Trek site and found the ability to create your own Trek character. So, we get Daniel as Kirk and Sean as Spock. Quite fun, actually. I had to check it out myself, and I wound up creating this Romulan character, with motion and custom speech.

Yes, that was Sweetie. sigh That face almost works as a Romulan.

Hope your weekend was fun. The pool opens next weekend, so you know what that means.

Will is excited that today is the first day of spring. And it definitely seems like it is closer — the weeping cherry tree has started popping some cherry flowers as of Thursday. Anything to chase away these colder days and nights.

And yes, the video and pictures from last week are coming. Almost done with them.

As I take a break for working on some documentation for work while watching March Madness, I just had to share this image with you. Apparently this is a weekly online series of pictures for The Telegraph (in the UK), with images from around the world. While this one caught my eye, there are many others to be enjoyed.

And speaking of enjoyment — enjoy spring, now that it is here.

Just had to get a couple of these pictures out there for you. The little leprechauns had a fun time at dinner time, getting a traditional Irish meal of corned beef and cabbage, soda bread, and green shamrock sugar cookies. Yum!

(And if you pay attention, you might be able to see the gap where Will’s sixth tooth used to be.)

Also wanted to share with you a classic tune from the original “Irish” tenors. Hope you had a Happy St. Patrick’s Day.

I thought we’d start your day off right with a toast (hopefully, that’s just orange juice in your glass and green milk on your cereal) and a reminder of what it means to be Irish. (I may resemble some of them.)

What It Means to be Irish

1. You will never play professional basketball.
2. You swear very well.
3. At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who is a nun, or uncle who’s a priest.
4. You think you sing very well.
5. You have no idea how to make a long story short!
6. There isn’t a big difference between you losing your temper or killing someone…
7. Much of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a mortal sin.
8. You have never hit your head on a ceiling.
9. You spent a good portion of your childhood kneeling in prayer (Catholic guilt forever!).
10. You’re strangely poetic after a few beers.
11. You are, therefore, poetic a lot.
12. You will be punched for no good reason…a lot.
13. Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past generations.
14. Many of your sisters and/or cousins are named Mary, Catherine or Eileen …. and there is at least one member of your family with the full name of Mary Catherine Eileen.
15. Someone in your family is very generous. It is more than likely you.
16. You may not know the words, but that doesn’t stop you from singing.
17. You can’t wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start talking.
18. You’re not nearly as funny as you think you are … but what you lack in talent, you make up for in frequency.
19. There wasn’t a huge difference between your last Wake and your last keg party.
20. You are, or know someone, named Murph.
21. If you don’t know Murph then you know Mac. If you don’t know Murph or Mac then you know Sully. Then you probably know Sully McMurphy.
22. You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret.
23. You have Irish Alzheimer’s… you forget everything but the grudges!
24. ‘Irish Stew’ is a euphemism for ‘boiled leftovers.’
25. All of your losses are alcohol-related ( loss of driver’s license, loss of money, loss of job, loss of significant other, loss of teeth from punch…) but it never stops you from drinking.
26. Your skin’s ability to tan…. not so much.
27. At this very moment, you have at least two relatives who are not speaking to each other (not fighting, mind you, just not speaking to each other).
28. Childhood remedies for the common cold often included whiskey.
29. There’s no leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at least 45 minutes.

We are finally getting the snow that Will has wanted all winter — something we can build a snow man with. In fact, we’re getting much more than is minimally necessary. School has already been canceled for tomorrow, even though the snow had been coming down for only about 3 hours. (It was the smart decision.)

As you can see from the picture to the right, that was taken only 90 minutes after the first flakes started coming down (after a long period of rain before that). The grass was already largely covered at that time. And that takes us to the pictures below, which were taken about 5 hours after the snow had started. The temporary spotlights on our front door are already covered (the glow in the snow), and you can see the snow piling up on the stoop railing. And it still continues to come down.

I’m getting this posted between power surges/outages (we’ve already had the computer shut down four times because of a long-enough power “outage” to flicker the lights). I was supposed to see the hand surgeon tomorrow to get final clearance on the hand, but I’m not so sure they’ll be open. We’ll see.

Tomorrow should be lots of fun, playing in the snow. Hopefully, we don’t have incidents quite like this.

At least he was a trooper for signing off on the live feed.

Literally — a different breed. Police in Nigeria have a goat in custody that witnesses claimed was involved in an attempted robbery.

I don’t think I can say anything else about this one.

More on the family later this week…

This made the news back in December, but I missed it. (Not surprising, given the hectic nature of the month and the broken hand slowing me down.) I was listening to a Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me podcast last week, and they had a bit about this — remaking familiar Christmas carols into odes to clean coal technology.

Yes, it is real.

The video for Frosty the Coalman has been saved for posterity. After all, who doesn’t want to sing the following?

Frosty the Coalman, is a jolly happy soul,
He’s abundant here in America and he helps our economy roll.
Frosty the Coalman’s getting cleaner every day
He’s affordable and adorable and helps workers keep their pay.

There is no real news in this posting. Rather, it’s just a simple attempt to provide some humor heading into the weekend. And the postings at Fail Blog, which show real-life situations gone wrong, usually amuse. These two recent postings just jumped out at me.

First, the folks in the Washington, DC area will be pleased to know that their local TV broadcasters are of the highest quality.

Then, there is the unfortunate placement of a price sticker (quite possible staged, but still funny).